For the joy of it

I have been a part of the direct selling industry for almost twenty years.  Twenty years?!  How did that happen? Similar to most people in this profession, I did not go looking for this career.  I had other plans and other dreams that included writing, a husband, children, and friendships.  But it never would have included direct sales. This job found me and much to my surprise, it has provided me with the income and flexibility to have the opportunity to write, enjoy time with my husband, raise my own children, and develop some incredible friendships.  
This industry gets a bad rap and I must admit there are many things that I do not like about what I do.  (Do you know any working person who can't name some things that he or she doesn't like about a certain job? I think not.) The founder of our company says that 80% of what we do is positive and 20% is for the birds. I would agree.  Most of what we have the opportunity to do is not only positive, but exceptional. So let's not focus on the 20%.  

 Who is involved in direct selling?
 An estimated 15.9 million people are involved in direct selling in the U.S., and more than 90 million worldwide. About 80 percent of US direct sellers are women. The vast majority are independent business people - they are micro-entrepreneurs whose purpose is to sell the product and/or services of the company they voluntarily choose to represent - not employees of the company. 

This industry provides the opportunity to make a great deal of money, but I became involved twenty years ago to be able to stay home with my children, not to become a millionaire.  When I switched companies eleven years ago, I had witnessed the income potential and I hit the ground running.  We have built a very successful organization filled with incredible women and families.  We have enjoyed the privilege of speaking into their lives and watching them grow into successful people, not just successful business owners.  But now what? The business that had begun as a way to stay home with my children becomes the thing that keeps me distracted from them.  The pressure of keeping this business going diminishes the relationships that it is built upon.  Particularly with my company, direct selling should be about relationships.  It is about serving people, sharing hope with them and honoring God by our actions toward others. That is a blessing and there is joy in that. There is purpose and fulfillment in a life lived serving others and bringing hope. If that is true, then why do I feel so stressed and discouraged?  
Perhaps it is because of how those of us in the business are viewed by others. Even when we truly do want to help people raise money for a fundraiser or throw a party to cheer up a girlfriend, we are often seen as self-promoting.  That can be very discouraging.

I have been talking with many of the ladies on our team about this and realize that many others are feeling the same way.  Yes, we do earn a living by selling to people, but that doesn't have to mean that our intentions are self-serving.Yes, we can make a great deal of income doing this business, but when the income becomes necessary, even vital to the financial stability of the family, the pressure to earn bullies the desire to serve and the whole point can be lost.  

I want to encourage people today, perhaps especially myself, to run this business for the joy of it. Stop striving to get somewhere and start being more effective where you are. Being the top sales person means very little if it damages a family, a marriage, or makes the customers feel used.  If each person would focus on the blessing she can be today to another person, and if every sale we make is truly more about the interaction with that customer, and if challenging our teams to work hard  becomes more about helping them than helping ourselves, then we can do this business for the joy of it and trust that in serving and loving, our needs will be met.  

I still do not love this career.  I still have so many things that I want to do outside of this. But what I do love is the opportunity to be a blessing to someone else, to inspire someone to become a better version of herself, to laugh with a hostess who hasn't laughed all day, but is happy you came over.  Hold onto what is good. Hold on to that 80% positive and let everything else work itself out.  Do not allow the pessimists to squelch the belief that we truly can serve here. Be a blessing and strengthen this industry by making it more about the relationship with each individual person and less about personal accomplishment.  The joy of that will be contagious and everyone will want to be a part of that joy.

Lent

It has been a while since I've shared and as we begin the practice of Lent tomorrow, I wanted to share my thoughts.
I really want to have a good lent. But what does that mean? 

For me, it means simplifying, scaling back on the worldly things. It means pulling back from indulgence, abundance, and excess in order to clean out my soul. Lent is a detox for the soul. I want to feel refreshed, renewed on Easter Sunday- ready to receive all the goodness of the resurrection.
Giving something up for lent isn't an old fashioned, meaningless ritual unless of course, that's how we practice it. The Church gives us touch-points, a cadence to our year that helps us to grow in holiness. There are times of fasting and sacrifice, and there are times of celebration and excess. So no, lent isn't about merely giving up some treat or vice, it is about recognizing how many things come between us and God, and our willingness to let go of even just one of these as an offering to Him, as a way of saying...yes, I really love this, but I love You more. I will let go of this to make room in my heart, my thoughts, and my schedule for more of You. 

Choosing to see God as the center of our lives is difficult with all of the other distractions of our world today.  But don't be too quick to blame our culture.  The practice of lent and the sacrifice that we are called to make came about long before technology, television, or even electricity.  We are distracted because we are broken.  We choose to replace God as the center of our lives, not because there are so many other more appealing things vying for our attention, but because we believe we could do something better.  We believe that we have something more important, more valuable to add; as if God didn't create everything perfectly already.  We put ourselves at the center of everything, regardless of how many or how few gadgets we choose to purchase. We can become distracted with our own thoughts of grandeur which lead us away from God.
Choose to see lent, not as a church-thing or an obligation, but as a season of sacrificial discipline during which we prepare our hearts for Easter in the same way that Jesus sacrificed in the desert prior to his ministry. Choose to practice this season of sacrifice if only to admit that we often supplant God from His rightful place in our lives and in our hearts. If I want to produce better fruit, I must first take this time to willingly be pruned. Yes, Lord. I am here and willing.

Failing can be a success

For some reason we seem to believe that in order to be walking in God's will we must be experiencing success.  Where does that come from?  I mean, if we are supposed to be followers of Christ, we would see that just isn't the case.  Walking in God's will for Jesus looked like absolute failure to everyone else around him.

I struggle with this idea that God's success may look like failure to me.  I do not think that I am alone in this struggle.  I don't always need everything to work out perfectly and I do not expect to have all the money and fame anyone could want, but I do find myself questioning my path simply because I'm not experiencing the kind of success that I believe that I should.

Perhaps, in my apparent failures, God is working out a success for Himself.  Perhaps by my falling down, missing the mark, disappointing others' hopes for me there are times when I am exactly where God wills me to be. I mean, who's story do I think I'm in anyway, mine? 

It is very difficult to accept worldly failures under any circumstance, but I find it even more difficult to accept those failures with the added awareness that God is allowing that failure to happen in order to create some other good, perhaps not even for me. That doesn't seem fair now does it?

It is very easy to get caught up in the idea that my life is about me, that I am the starring role and that everyone around me is ensemble.  We live in a world that not only perpetuates this myth, but feeds it regularly with doses of advertisements and movie trailers that play on that very heart string.

But it is not about me, well, at least not in the lead role.  What if we all began to live life as if we were all just bit parts, walk-ons, cameos in the story about Someone else? What lifestyle changes would we make if our perspective switched to see through Another person's grand plan for all of humankind instead of trying to make all of humankind about our wishes?

My book Living Intentionally teaches people how to discover their unique gifts and desires and learn how to use them through learning who God is and who He has created them to be.  However, I think it stops short in some ways because it doesn't take that final step into realizing the purpose of "living life on purpose" may in fact not have everything to do with us, but many things to do with many others in our lives.

Learning to live life on purpose should lead us to live outside of ourselves and seek ways to serve all of the other cast members around us in a way that will bring glory to the Star of the story.  I am working on this. I am discerning what gifts God has given me and striving to use those abilities in the way that best honors the Giver.  But I tend to find myself getting in the way.

Lord I ask that you will help me to view my success and failure through the lens of eternity and not merely my limited human awareness.  Use my every effort to build Your kingdom and please give me the grace to believe that sometimes, even my failures are part of the Master plan.

Jesus, as a celebrity

I have been thinking lately as I talk with other women that perhaps our inability to truly feel connected with Jesus is somehow related to how we seem to "connect" with other people.
We seem to know an awful lot about other people, particularly celebrities.  We know everything from the birthdate to the favorite color of any number of famous people.  Does that mean we know them?
What does knowing Jesus look like?

(Pictures taken from the movie, The Gospel of John  Release Date:2003 (initial release) Director: Phillip Saville)


NAME: Jesus of Nazareth
DOB: December 25, 0 (or at least that's what we tell everyone, unless of course we go with the true story which is He was always from the beginning as the Word)
PARENTS: mary and joseph, and God
OCCUPATION: carpenter and messiah
KNOWN ACQUAINTANCES: Peter, James, John, Matthew, Andrew, Judas, Phillip, Bartholemew, Thomas, Thaddeaus, Simon, Mathias
ACCOMPLISHMENTS: turned water into wine, healed the blind man, fed thousands with just 5 loaves of bread, raised the dead, cured the lame, rose himself from death
DIED: was crucified at the age of 33 for crimes against the Jewish authority
ROSE AGAIN: three days later, He rose from death and appeared to His followers
CURRENT RESIDENCE: He is seated at the right hand of the Father in heaven.

This could be a page in some fan magazine, right?  All the facts and information about Jesus that we need to know him. 

It's silly really how many people believe they know the celebrities they follow.  We can know about a lot of things and certainly research a lot about people.  But to KNOW someone...well, that's a bit different isn't it?

In Greek,  eido means to see mechanically, academically; to inspect, examine and observe.  However, ginosko means to absolutely know by intimate experience, to feel, comprehend, perceive.  When we talk about knowing someone, which "know" do we mean? 

In all relationships, we must first know about someone before we come to know them intimately.  Learning about my husband when we were dating was important so that I could trust him, trust his choices, his behavior and his love for me enough that I was willing to be vulnerable with him.

The same is true in our relationship with Jesus.  Yes, we must learn about God....His character, His promises and His choices, but we should not stop there!  After we know about Him, we move into an intimate knowing of Him and that is where our lives change because His love transforms us from the inside.

Don't just be a fan of Jesus, collecting memorabilia and factual information.  Move deeper into a relationship with Him and become intoxicated with His presence, not merely interested in His accomplishments.

Last Night's Dream

Last night I dreamt that Obama came to our house to visit and talk about his positions.  I am not going to affiliate myself with any group, organization, religion or other social demographic.  We were cordial and he sat in our living room and talked about kids and Michelle and asked about ours.  He talked about his desire to help and in his charismatic way gave us his vision for the future. We asked questions and challenged him on certain topics from small business to taxes to the best ways to help those who are less fortunate.

As he was leaving, my husband and I both reached out and shook his hand and said goodbye.  After he was gone, Jesus stood there crying asking me why I didn’t defend Him.  How could I politely discuss money and business without defending life.

You see, it doesn’t really matter if Obama’s policies would in fact help this country.  It doesn’t matter what we believe about Obamacare.  It becomes completely irrelevant whether or not we agree with his political stance or support his type of government.  He adamantly chooses to continue to kill the unborn and destroy the lives of women.

I am not famous.  I am not rich.  I am a wife, a mom, a sister, a daughter, a friend just like many of you.  It doesn’t matter whether you stand with the donkeys or the elephants, our country is murdering its children and destroying millions of women’s lives in the process.

I support life, yes of course the life of the unborn children who cannot defend themselves.  But I also support life, the other victims of Choice, the mothers.  When we are afraid, we seek someone to trust and many of these young women are scared and so they trust the grown-ups around them.  They trust the government and the kind lady at the clinic.  They believe the lie that tomorrow all of this will go away and no one will have to know.

Abortion destroys two lives.  The baby never gets to start its life and the mother’s choice dictates the rest of hers.  If we legalized murder, would that make it acceptable to our soul?  Would we be able to live with ourselves?  If that were true, then why do soldiers who return from war struggle with PTSD?  The horrors of murder destroy their mind and their soul.  Killing, no matter how it is said to be acceptable never will be and those who commit this crime will pay for it within themselves.  It may not be a crime against our laws to murder your child within you, but it is and always will be a crime against humanity, against life and against the One who created life.

I am pro life because I care about women.  I have so many friends who have come to me to share their grief, their pain and the internal destruction caused by their abortions that happened 5-10—20 years ago.  How is this the best choice for them?  A 20 year prison sentence does not sound like we care for our women. 

In this dream, I never defended women or the unborn.  I civilly discussed worldly issues with this candidate, but not once did I even challenge him on his concern for women or accuse him of upholding our choice to murder our children.  Forgive me, Jesus for my silence.  Even though it was only my dream, I awoke wondering how many other times I’ve remained silent when I should have spoken up. 

Regardless of who takes office, God is still on the throne and it is His policies that I concern myself with the most.  If I seek first His kingdom and follow first His policies, all other things will be given.  My leader, Jesus is against murder and He is against the destruction of women’s lives through glossy lies and the smoke and mirrors of the media.  If I agree with every other policy of a candidate, but he is against life, then I am against him.  Jesus says we are either with Him or against Him.  Forgive me Lord for ever hesitating about whose side I am on.  I choose life.  I choose women.  I choose Christ. 

Vote life….for all of us.

Summertime

We have been gone more than we have been home in the past two months.  In that time we also bought a house and will be moving the end of July.  It's been a pretty full few weeks.
I have been taking time to consider my priorities and look for ways to make my spoken priorities match my daily activities!
We can all say what is most important, but would anyone know it by watching our daily lives?
I tend to be too analytical and too introspective, wondering if I'm doing the right things, pleasing the right people, accomplishing enough work, utilizing my gifts, being a good steward, spending enough time with my kids....why do we worry so much about such things?

Remember when summertime seemed to last forever?  We would spend all day outside, in the woods, at the creek, at the pool.  There was an endless supply of sunshine and free time to enjoy it.  Truly, summertime is exactly the same amount of time today as it was in 1978.  Did you know that?  Now that I live in the south, there is MORE sunshine and it starts getting hot earlier....so technically, it should seem longer, right? What changed?

I did.

Summertime is for slow-paced walks and leisurely talks. Summertime is for late nights in the moonlight and long afternoons in the lake.  Summertime is a time to remember what it feels like to slow down and bask.

How much basking have you gotten in so far this summer?
I stopped considering the vast array of possibilities that lay before me each day and started fretting about the list of have-to-dos that loom.  How much of what I do is urgent and necessary and how much is out of my own need to control results. (not that that ever works anyway.)

Basking in the sun.  ( or even basking in the Son) How about basking in the Son while basking in the sun.  That would be a beautiful way to spend a summer day!

Don't rush through summer.
Don't rush through these weeks, speeding them on past the 4th right to Labor Day weekend and then
wonder what happened to the summer!
I read this recently:

A well-known pastor was once asked what was his most profound regret in life?  “Being in a hurry.” That is what he said.  “Getting to the next thing without fully entering the thing in front of me. I cannot think of a single advantage I’ve ever gained from being in a hurry. But a thousand broken and missed things, tens of thousands, lie in the wake of all the rushing.… Through all that haste I thought I was making up time. It turns out I was throwing it away.”

These next two weeks before my next trip, I want to savor each day.  I will log each day here to share with you my not-to-grownup-more-nostalgic-summertime pass times.  I hope that by sharing I will hold myself accountable to it and perhaps inspire some of you to grab the picnic basket and head out to some favorite location....just to do a little basking.  Would love to hear what you might come up with too!

For today: start dreaming of some crazy plans for tomorrow!  Have a blessed day!

Time

There is way too much talk about time management...as if we could actually manage time.
That is just another illusion we create for ourselves to make our need to control things a bit easier.

We cannot manage time, however we can...
enjoy it
waste it
protect it
misuse it
give it away

What are you doing with your time?

I've been doing some thinking (I know, right?) about priorities and what I value most.
Creative things are important to me....writing, painting, photography, music

Relationships are important to me...Jesus, Glenn, kids, family, friends

Pursuit of passions and interests is important to me....travel, learning new languages, better health, inspiring others

Am I spending the majority of time on my priorities or am I spending the majority of time on someone else's priorities because I keep allowing others to dictate my schedule...my days, hours, minutes....

good question.

I can't remember who said this first, but it certainly wasn't me...

The most important things should never be sacrificed in order to finish the unimportant.

(or something like that!)

So, deciding what we mean by important would be a great place to start, right?
There are some things that need to be done like bathing, eating, sleeping, taking out the trash.
I'm talking about the time we spend at the mercy of someone else's schedule and priorities.

A ringing phone, and unexpected visitor, surprises in your inbox...

My work is important and I need to remind myself what that work is and how it is best done.  I know what
I need to do on any given day and I must keep that important stuff important!

My family is important and I need to remind myself that even they are not the dictators of how I fill my time. 

We each do truly get to choose our day.  It's easier to blame others for the things we have to do, but there are really many fewer "have to's" than we may think.

If we work a full time job from 9-5, then yes, we are required to be there...but even within that time....who is dictating your day?  Are we so busy putting out other peoples' fires and addressing everyone else's concerns that we are no longer proactively creating our work day and accomplishing our most important things?

Adults have responsibilities, but we also have choices.  What are you going to choose to do with your time today?  Most of what we do requires less time than we give it. Being intentional with our necessary activities so we can be more effective in our results will free up some of that 24 hours so we can be selective about how we spend it.

Do something whimsical today....create some space in your time for something you are passionate about....and then enjoy it!

Have a beautiful day!